We move into our new apartment tomorrow, four weeks to the day after landing here. We have loved spending time with our friends, but we are looking forward to having our own little space again. The five of us have been living out of the same two suitcases for the last three months. Our wardrobes will soon be expanded as will my time spent cooking. Aside from school lunches I haven't had to prepare any meals for over two months. If you know me, you will know that I have not missed meal preparation!
Four weeks ago, we began our apartment search. How many apartments did we see? Twenty? Thirty? More?? We put offers on three other apartments before this one and all three were turned down for an offer of more money (the renting process here is much like the buying process back home - much negotiating). We loved those apartments, particularly the last of the three. It was a ground floor with a small backyard that was home to a tiny snatch of grass. It had the bunk beds that so burdened Ava to say good-bye to in Canada. It had a pink potty for little Izzy who was so hoping for a new house that was 'pink and sparkles'. It was so us and yet it was not to be ours. When we didn't get it my heart was sad and I was tired of looking.
Our new home is smaller than the others and not really our style, on the sixth floor with small balconies, it has no clothes dryer, no real bathtubs, no dish washer, an old, confusing washing machine and a cockroach infestation in the kitchen. But, it is in a great location, is clean and everything seems to be in working condition. It has three great bedrooms, one with two single beds a perfect size for Ava and Izzy. It has purple and pink furniture and area rugs much to the girls' delight and ornate drapes between the rooms that hold the promise of many theatrical debuts. The formal dining room table is much too big and ornate for our family and yet has the room to host many guests or, conversely, drape with sheets to make the most magical of forts. The faux crystal chandeliers may seem gaudy to us, yet the girls were awed to have such beauty in THEIR house.
When we saw the apartment for the first time, it didn't make me want to do a happy dance. To be completely honest, it just made me sad that we didn't get the other three we had put offers on. Later in the day though, I thought about what we would have done if we had seen that apartment the first week we came. We would have taken it without reservation. It is in a great location and doesn't have any major flaws. I realized that the longer we looked at apartments, the more we saw certain things that we wanted. This one had a huge outdoor space, but was on the fifth floor with no elevator. That one comes with a washer and dryer and a dishwasher, but has zero cupboard space and toilets that don't work. The more we saw, the more I thought we could get one with all of the good and none of the bad. In fact, the more we saw, the more I thought we deserved to have it all. I did't like what I was seeing in myself. We would have taken our apartment the first week and been happy. Very happy. How easy it is to become discontented, to always want more, to feel like we deserve better and then deserve even more the next week.
To most of the people we see day to day our apartment would be a palace. Three bedrooms for five people!? The shop keepers on the very same road as our apartment building make approximately $50 a day. The cost of living here is very similar to Canada. These are the people that actually have shops and jobs and are not refugees. There are street children that beg for money just outside the door to our building. Perspective can be very helpful. So, I will embrace the refuge that is such a gift. I will embrace the overly-ornate furniture, try to be joyful while washing dishes and try my hand at hanging our clothes for awhile. This is, after all, the first time in our married life that we do not share a washing machine with anyone. We can do laundry whenever we want! And, I will depend on Christ for my contentment, joy and generosity. Without Him I am sure to fail at all three!
Four weeks ago, we began our apartment search. How many apartments did we see? Twenty? Thirty? More?? We put offers on three other apartments before this one and all three were turned down for an offer of more money (the renting process here is much like the buying process back home - much negotiating). We loved those apartments, particularly the last of the three. It was a ground floor with a small backyard that was home to a tiny snatch of grass. It had the bunk beds that so burdened Ava to say good-bye to in Canada. It had a pink potty for little Izzy who was so hoping for a new house that was 'pink and sparkles'. It was so us and yet it was not to be ours. When we didn't get it my heart was sad and I was tired of looking.
Our new home is smaller than the others and not really our style, on the sixth floor with small balconies, it has no clothes dryer, no real bathtubs, no dish washer, an old, confusing washing machine and a cockroach infestation in the kitchen. But, it is in a great location, is clean and everything seems to be in working condition. It has three great bedrooms, one with two single beds a perfect size for Ava and Izzy. It has purple and pink furniture and area rugs much to the girls' delight and ornate drapes between the rooms that hold the promise of many theatrical debuts. The formal dining room table is much too big and ornate for our family and yet has the room to host many guests or, conversely, drape with sheets to make the most magical of forts. The faux crystal chandeliers may seem gaudy to us, yet the girls were awed to have such beauty in THEIR house.
When we saw the apartment for the first time, it didn't make me want to do a happy dance. To be completely honest, it just made me sad that we didn't get the other three we had put offers on. Later in the day though, I thought about what we would have done if we had seen that apartment the first week we came. We would have taken it without reservation. It is in a great location and doesn't have any major flaws. I realized that the longer we looked at apartments, the more we saw certain things that we wanted. This one had a huge outdoor space, but was on the fifth floor with no elevator. That one comes with a washer and dryer and a dishwasher, but has zero cupboard space and toilets that don't work. The more we saw, the more I thought we could get one with all of the good and none of the bad. In fact, the more we saw, the more I thought we deserved to have it all. I did't like what I was seeing in myself. We would have taken our apartment the first week and been happy. Very happy. How easy it is to become discontented, to always want more, to feel like we deserve better and then deserve even more the next week.
To most of the people we see day to day our apartment would be a palace. Three bedrooms for five people!? The shop keepers on the very same road as our apartment building make approximately $50 a day. The cost of living here is very similar to Canada. These are the people that actually have shops and jobs and are not refugees. There are street children that beg for money just outside the door to our building. Perspective can be very helpful. So, I will embrace the refuge that is such a gift. I will embrace the overly-ornate furniture, try to be joyful while washing dishes and try my hand at hanging our clothes for awhile. This is, after all, the first time in our married life that we do not share a washing machine with anyone. We can do laundry whenever we want! And, I will depend on Christ for my contentment, joy and generosity. Without Him I am sure to fail at all three!
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